ME HUMAN, YOU ALIEN: How to Talk to an Extraterrestrial

by Jonathan Vos Post

(c) 1996 by Emerald City Publishing an excerpt from a book entitled THE HANDBOOK OF UFO CONTACT, to appear Spring 1997, New York: William Morrow & Co.
Copyright 1996, by Emerald City Publishing. All rights reserved. May not be reproduced without permission. May be posted electronically provided that it is transmitted unaltered, in its entirety, and without charge.


Introduction and Chapter One
A Handful of Coins, A Loop of String, a Flashlight, and Two Magnets Pocket Change Worth Billions A Loop of String, Approximately 72" in Circumference Cat's Cradle Soldier's Bed = Church Window = Fish Pond
Chapter Two
A Pocket Flashlight Two Small Bar Magnets Experiment 1: Magnet and Compass Experiment 2: Testing UFO Material Experiment 3: Magnetization, Magnetic Induction, and Curie Point A Pad of Paper and a Couple of Pens or Pencils
Chapter Three
Speech Lessons, Informants, and Two or More Extraterrestrials Protocol and Protagoras: The Empirical Approach
Chapter Four
What Kind of Language? Sound, Light, Viruses, and Neutrinos (a) Light (b) Sound (c) Smell (d) Taste (e) Touch (f) Posture (g) Biomorphic Writing (h) Biological Vectors (i) Direct Nerve Contact (j) Exotic Radiations (k) Telepathy (l) Combinations
Chapter Five
Linear or Nonlinear? Systematic, We Hope I Never Metasystem I Didn't Like What is the Meaning of Meaning? Arbitrary is as Arbitrary Does Conventions: Pay at the Door By Way of Contrast You're So Creative! Unique in All the Universe Similarity
Chapter Six
Pythagorus, Rosetta Stone, and Omnilingual: Science Fiction Insights Gauss and Pythagorean Triangle Weinbaum's "A Martian Odyssey" Knuth and Arithmetic Leinster's "First Contact" Piper's "Omnilingual" Sagan's Intellectual Seive Aldiss' "Dark Light Years" Clarke's "Childhood's End" Dickson's "Alien Way" Gallun's "Old Faithful" Hoyle's "Black Cloud"
Chapter Seven
Leiber's "Wanderer" Violent Sci-Fi Movies Yefremov's "Heart of the Serpent" MacLean's "Pictures Don't Lie" Mann's "Eye of the Queen" Masson's "Not So Certain" Niven's "Mote in God's Eye" Watson's "Embedding"
Chapter Eight
Delany's "Babel-17" Vance's "Language of Pao" Lem's "Solaris" Sagan's "Contact" Pohl's "JEM" Moffitt's "Jupiter Theft" Clement's "Mission of Gravity"
Chapter Nine
White's "All Judgment Fled" Farmer's "Mother" Lasswitz' "Two Planets" Oliver's "Unearthly Neighbors" Recent Fiction LeGuin's "Author of the Acacia Seeds" Sheckley's "Language of Love" to be done Fontenay's "Communication" to be done Kerr's "Communication" to be done Aarons' "Communicators" to be done Further Adventures in Exo-Linguistic Analysis to be done
Chapter Ten
Aliens, Language, and Twilight Zone Aliens, Language, and The Outer Limits A Collection of Memorable Aliens
Chapter Eleven: Bibliography
Chapter Twelve: Appendices
Appendix: People to Contact for First Contact Appendix: Declaration of Principles Following the Detection...